To make someone fall in love with you, you have to fall in love with yourself first.

I didn't realise the sense of this sentence until now. I wish I did when I was younger.

It's not that I ever truly hated myself but I didn't love myself neither. For all my life, I knew that my appearance and my communication skills weren't my strongest points because I never heard someone telling me I was beautiful or that they considered me like an interesting personne. I was good at school and I had good grades but that's it. So it naturally became my only strong point: my academic results.

Well, it's maybe  not bad to think you are smart enough to have good grades but I have to tell you that it never ever gave me a reason to have good self-esteem: whenever I go, guys don't look at me with interest, they don't fall in love with me, they act like I am not here, like I am just a part of paysage and, well, it's sad because when you see no one likes you, you just start to think the same. 

Well, I think I don't have to explain that when you don't have a good self-esteem, it's difficult  not only to have boyfriends but also to make friends...

The truth is I am tired of it. I really am. I want to have friends. I want to spend my life in the way that makes me happy. I want to be happy. And I want to fall in love and being loved. 

I realise I have to start with my self-esteem and more particularly I have to start taking care of myself. I want my blog to be the chronicles of my path to being more confident about myself, to enjoying my life, to being more social. And in the meanwhile, I will post some random stuff like books I read, movies I saw, things I have to say and whatever I want to be here :)